November - Darkness
“The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” (John 1:5)
November is truly the time when the approach of winter and darker days becomes a reality. Following a mild autumn, even I have finally put the heating on and find myself in the dark while walking my dogs first thing in the morning.
As a small child, darkness was something that made me feel anxious. Sounds that were a part of the normal creaking of the house seemed to magnify and my inability to see properly in the dark unsettled me. As an adult who is not anxious in the same way, and in fact would much rather have total darkness in order to sleep, I can still be unsettled with concerns that seem to have literally grown out of all proportion, until exposed to the light of day when they shrink back like weeds under a scorching sun.
October- Death Café
Join others for the first meeting of the Death Café.
Tuesday 4th November 2.00 to 3.30pm at The Barn, Woolacombe.
This October marks a sad anniversary for me. It was a year ago that my beloved husband unexpectedly died.
Forgive me my indulgence in sharing this with you, but over this year as I have struggled to learn to live a new life, I have been reflecting on the difficult subject of death itself.
A couple of months after Les died, I was kindly invited to a function and was introduced by a well-meaning soul as ‘Susan who has just lost her husband.’
Susan, who has lost her husband. How very careless I thought! I haven’t lost him; he hasn’t travelled somewhere without telling me, passed away, departed, fallen asleep or any of the euphemisms we use to try to soften the subject of death. He has simply died. He is dead, and at times it has been agony.
As a widow, I am no different to any other bereaved partner. There are so many of you who will know the agony of separation from someone hugely significant to you and it doesn’t have to be a spouse. Yet, as a Christian minister who cannot hide away from death, who is called to speak hope into its finality, I increasingly feel that a conversation needs to be opened about our fears, our curiosity, our discomfort and our awkwardness with even saying the word – death.
As the autumn continues with increasingly shorter days and the prospect of winter ahead; as we turn once again to the festivals surrounding death – Halloween, All Souls, All Saints, and of course, Remembrance, it seems to be a good time to meet together to listen, to discuss and if it is appropriate, to share our thoughts and feelings about an incredibly important subject.